I don’t think there is a better feeling than holding a sleeping baby on your chest. I just had to put that out there because Rowan is cuddled up on me right now in the Moby wrap as I write this. It makes me smile from ear to ear. It’s our little routine during the day when she takes a nap. I change her, feed her, then wrap her up and we sit here in this big leather office chair and rock back and forth listening to Nathan McKee (Leanne Marshall’s Project Runway Music) on repeat and she falls asleep and I get some work done. I can feel her heart beat against mine and every so often I stop and take a deep breath, smelling the top of her head. Oh baby’s smell so good. I like these moments.
We are adjusting good into our new life with her. There are def. still ups and downs but for the most part we are still in a groove movin’ forward. It’s funny how you will think you have conquered something and have it all figured out and then something changes and you start all over again. I guess thats what happens when you have a baby that continues to grow- things change. Things don’t stand still. Its good though it It keeps us on our toes. She is starting to become a little more independent. She will be happy lying down playing by herself for like 15 mins. haha that is huge! She smiles so much now too- it’s so cute! My goal everyday is to make her smile as much as possible.
I have my 6 week appointment tomorrow. I am ready for the green light to start exercising a little. I hope it will make me take a little better care of myself. I find myself at 4pm thinking have I eaten anything today? It just seems to be the one thing that I push aside during the day because there is so much other stuff to do. I need to get better at having breakfast and lunch. I know it will give me more energy. I am not doing it intentionally I just get busy.
Some people have asked us about our bed time routine because Rowan sleeps so good thru the night. Its not something we stick to every night but we try as consistently as we can. We start around 9:30pm & head into our bedroom (she sleeps in there with us in her Stroller Bassinet). We have dimmer switches on our bedside lamps, so I turn them down to keep the room dim. I turn on some relaxing music and we undress her. Give her a bath (every other night) and then we massage her a little as we put on some lotion. We get her dressed in her jammies and we swaddle her. Then I nurse her and rock her/sing to her until she starts to get really sleepy. Then I put her into her little bassinet. She usually wakes a little but I leave her so she gets use to falling asleep on her own. I turn a fan on for white noise and then I shut the door and say good night. She does fuss and cry some nights but we leave her. If she starts crying I always look at the clock and set a time that if she doesnt stop crying I will go in and get her but I have never had to go in- she always falls asleep before my time limit is up. Usually under 10 mins.
Swaddling is key for us and that her bassinet is a cozy small space- I think she feels safe and secure in there. We have to swaddle her in those straight jacket swaddlers with the velcro. She busts out of any hand wrapped blanket and then will instantly wake up. She has a crazy startle reflex. We are going to start moving up her time for bed to around 8. That will give Kev and I more of an evening together before we go to bed as well.
I am still nursing. Do I love it? No. I don’t. It’s a daily struggle for me. It has nothing to do with her not feeding well because she does. I just don’t enjoy it and that makes me feel really guilty. I have decided to nurse her up to her 2 month doc. appointment and then I think I might switch to formula. I know I might get lots of slack for that, but unless something changes in the next 2 weeks that is what I think my plan is. We gave her, her first formula bottle last night. She drank it like a champ and then had the longest little happy time yet. There was no crying, no fussing, no grunting or kicking like she usually does in the evenings. We have really tough evenings with her. Our doctor had recommended that we try 1 bottle of Soy formula in the evenings before she gets upset and see if that helps. Well it seemed to really help her. So its hard not to think she will be a happier baby if she is always having formula. I don’t know? It’s something that I do go back and forth on every day. We have been having lots of situations lately where she is being watched by our parents and that means they need bottles. I have been pumping like a mad women, but I only have a hand pump and I can only pump on my left side. Which still takes like 30 mins to get 4 ounces. So I keep nursing her on my right, but that is the side that always hurts the most- so it is getting worse because I keep nursing her on that side so I can have enough on my left to pump. It’s a disaster. There is no winning.
Some of you have asked about what I wear to nurse. If I am going out and I know I will be back in time to nurse I wear whatever. If I am going to be out for a while and know I will have to nurse her somewhere I usually just wear a button down shirt and a cardigan. I am not a good social nurser though. Rowan hates the cape thing so I end up going in another room or sitting in the back of the car so it really doesn’t matter what I have on because I usually just unrobe anyways. Sorry to sound so negative about nursing. I know its so good for her and that is why I am so guilt stricken over it but if it’s making me stressed is that really doing her any good anyways? I don’t think so. Its different for every one. Some nurse for years and some not at all. I am just trying to figure out where I fall.
On a different note. How cute is Rowans Oneise? It’s my new favorite. There is just something so adorable about a baby in a onesie. I think it is there chubby legs showing. I just want to nibble on them! Her oneise is from a company called Barely & Birch. They are an awesome Organic kids clothing company. I love that on their website it says “Kid’s have dibs on the future. Let’s give them a good one.” Thinking about Rowan growing up of course I want her to live on a planet that isn’t full of pollutants. So providing clothing from a company that is doing so much good is a great place to start. Kev and I love screen printing so I was so excited to look thru all their water based screen printed tees. They have so many cute ones. Make sure you go and check out their site!
*onesie c/o Barley & Birch