Well little Miss Rowan Winter is actually going to be 3 weeks on Sunday but I guess that’s the life of new mom: Late at everything! Here is our picture from Two Weeks anyways.
The second week was much better than the first. I really can’t express how hard the first week at home was. It was nothing like what I had expected. It really took us by surprise. The second week was still very hard but had much more sleep involved which lead to a much happier & coherent Mommy and Daddy. The second week we started deciding things for ourselves instead of from things we had read. The major one being letting ourselves sleep as well when she had fallen asleep on us. Rowan would NOT sleep if she was not being held and after reading and being warned over and over about sids and the risks of sleeping with baby we had refused to sleep with her sleeping on our chest. Well after a week of maybe 3 hours a sleep a night and a first weekend of MAJOR breakdowns, we decided if we felt comfortable then by all means we were going to sleep with her. Did you know we are really the only country that doesn’t practice bed sharing? Anyways, lets just say it helped us a lot and now she is even sleeping in her bassinet at night for a few hours. (now in her third week even more!!)
Kev also went back to work during our second week. That was a little scary for me. The day he went back was also around the time I think we hit our first growth spurt. Rowan was hungry all the time and fussy all the other time. It was a hard 2 days home alone with her. I didn’t know why she was so upset all the time. I think she is a naturally gassy baby but those days were extra rough. I will be honest and say I still don’t love Breastfeeding. She latches good and she eats like a champ, but it still hurts like heck and its a hard feeling sometimes knowing you are the only one that can feed her. I am committed with sticking with it for at least a month and seeing if I feel differently then. I am slowing seeing how other moms love it but I am just taking it day by day.
Although it is still tough and we are stilling trying to figure each other out, our love for her continues to grown everyday. The first day Kev went to work he came running thru the door that night so excited to see her because he missed her so much. In such a short time you can’t image your life with out them and you miss them when you are away. It has def. made us slow down a whole lot these last 2 weeks but it has been such a joy to spend them together as a family. Each day I wake up and am excited to learn something more that day that I didn’t know before about her and we get to learn it together, Kev, Me and Rowan.
On a side note this concludes all our Guest posts. A big Thank You! to all my blogger buddies for helping me out.
I will return to regular blogging on Monday.
Next Week will have:
1. My first Style Files post baby
2. The winners of Guessing Rowans name/bday/weight
3. Week 3
4. My birth story
Its going to be a great first week back!
P.s. Aren’t Rowans shoes so super cute? My dear friend Laura made them for me. You should def. check out her etsy shop!! She also made Rowans adorable Purple Flower hat as well.
I really appreciate and love how your’e being so real about sharing the struggles with us. I plan to have children some day and it’s hard to get the honest side of the story once you get past all the fluff.
I wish you all nothing but happiness!
You rock at being a mum! Ca’t wait for my time to shine one day!
Reading this post has given me some great tips and I thank you now and one day Ill thank you even more 🙂
XOXO
Yours Truly
The first thing I saw after seeing Rowan was that cute shoes… many more blessing for your family
wow, i’m so happy to see you share your experiences and follow your mama-instincts! the first few days at home with out son were impossible for me sleep-wise, until one night i fell asleep on my side while nursing him. we woke up, both happy and rested 5 hours later! it was a sleep miracle. cosleeping doesn’t work for everyone, but it worked beautifully in our house. i slept restfully, but was always aware of him next to me. he slept with us for 3 months, until he seemed to be sleeping through the night. we started putting him in his crib and it was the smoothest transition ever. our family wasn’t too supportive, but i found a natural mothers group in my town and ordered the dr. sears baby book which confirmed ALL of my natural instincts. anyways, this is all to say do what you feel is best. you know best. congrats!
She’s grown so much Jen!! Soooo cute!!
Meanwhile, just so you know – I HATED breastfeeding for the first month to 6wks with both my kids. It was a case of just sticking with it and suffering until it got better – and I’m not lying, one day, it just didn’t hurt as much as the day before, and slowly it started not hurting at all. It will get better!!
xoxo
While I don’t have a baby, I am the only single girl in a small town with a TON of friends who have babies (most in fact are on are their second) so am uber-familiar with the struggles you’re going through! I also read an article in Marie Clare? or Redbook? about how some moms DON’T love to breastfeed – and that’s ok! You just need to do whatever works for you!
Best of luck of continuing to adjust this new juncture in your life! She is adorable!! Those booties are ridiculously cute!!
I just want to encourage you to stick with the breastfeeding thing for at least a month or six weeks, because as others have said, it does get better and it does stop hurting. There will probably always be some challenges with it, but stick with it for awhile to give Rowan those immunities and to give you both a chance to enjoy it and get it to work for both of you.
I also want to encourage you to treasure every single moment, even the sleep-deprived 3:30 a.m. not-enjoying-the-breastfeeding-so-much ones, because soon enough they will be gone and you’ll want nothing more than for Rowan to be that teeny again. You only get each day once, so try to enjoy every single moment, because you’ll never get that day back. Trying to keep that attitude when I was SO tired and SO sick of feeding my little one every 2-3 hours really helped me to enjoy the time. And it really does go so, so fast.
I can’t believe it’s been three weeks already! Rowan is so adorable; I love her shoes! (Confession: I have a pair of slippers that look just like them!)
Thank you for sharing your journey with us, I love how candid you are! Your baby is beautiful, and those booties are gorgeous. Your guest posts were fun, but I look forward to all the upcoming stuff you have planned!
I’m not sure how anyone loves or even likes breastfeeding during that first month. It HURTS (although I swore by the Medela lanolin, applying after every feeding) and it feels like baby’s CONSTANTLY attached to you, which I didn’t like. BUT – pretty soon the feedings become a little farther apart, it won’t hurt anymore, and you’ll be more adept at the whole feeding process, making it go faster, which equals a MUCH better experience. For us it was worth pushing through to know that she’s getting my milk and she and I get to share that experience.
Those first 2-3 weeks are ROUGH – but the end is in sight! 🙂 Just wait – in two weeks time she’ll be smiling at you and already starting to act more like a baby and less like a newborn!
She’s so pretty! I know I’m nowhere close to being a mom, but I still really enjoyed reading this post 🙂 Great seeing you at the swap last night!
aww, it is so hard isn’t it. and it is nothing like you expect. i just want you to know that is 150% normal, how you are feeling. i’ve never met a mom who said different. it will get easier. and then it will get hard again. and then easier. and then hard again. lol. and then someday you’ll be where i am, sitting on the computer while the baby you once had is an insane three year old who is insisting on jumping off the highest part of the couch.
those first months with your new baby are so full of pain, joy, sadness, fear, loneliness, anger and everything else. it’s okay. i promise you will make it.
bed sharing is awesome. i love cuddling up at night with my whole family. good for you for deciding what works for you guys. every family is so different, and you have to trust your instincts. you guys will do great.
Hey Jen and Rowan! 🙂 What a sweet and presious baby! I’m sorry the first couple of weeks have been rough.. I imagine it can only get better though as you figure out what works for YALL! About the gassy baby thing… I’m not a mom or a vegetarian but on another blog I read http://alovelymorning.blogspot.com/ she is a vegetarian and a mom and like you is planning on raising her baby vegetarian. In this post http://alovelymorning.blogspot.com/2010/04/oatmealraisinchocolatechip-cookies.html she blamed gassy vegetables and a few other foods for a gassy baby… she never did a follow up post so I’m not sure if it was helpful to stop eating those ones but.. just thought maybe this could help! 🙂
Those shoes are the sweetest, and she is really a beautiful baby. By all means, sleep when she sleeps. Also, to be completely honest, I never *loved* breastfeeding the way some women do. It is painful (at first, but actually should get better after a few weeks to a month), uncomfortable, and does tie you down a bit, but I did it because I could & knew it was the best thing for my babies. Once you get into the swing of things, though, it has its moments – the bonding time is really nice, and it is kind of an easy method of comforting a cranky baby. Oh, and this might sound weird/gross, but once you start tummy time with her, it is good for getting the gas out – lol. Both of my kids were gassy too! Hang in there, and take care of yourself. 🙂
Her shoes are so totally precious, as is that polka dotted dress!
So happy to hear that things are getting better for you. It must be tough having a newborn the first go ’round, but hopefully it gets better with the second! I’ve always heard how painful breast feeding can be, and to tell you the truth, that’s what I’m most terrified of! And just the fact that you’re the only one that can help her, what a feeling.
Anyway, glad to hear that the family is well!
wow, looking forward to next week’s blogs. I was going to comment that her outfit is adorable (as is she) but the FIRST thing I noticed were those adorable knitted shoes. Soo cute and whimsical. Congrats and good luck as you continue your new adventure!
Keep trying the breastfeeding for longer than a month, please. It does hurt on and off but know that it’s absolutely the best thing for her especially since we are approaching flu season.
I did not love it either, and I still won’t say I can feel this wonderful bond but the thing that makes me most want to do it is the fact that I get MORE sleep this way. No preparing bottles, washing bottles etc.
BUT…if you are suffering and this is affecting your mental health, no one who is in their right mind will judge you. Do what is best for Rowan, I am sure that’s your focus.
Also, sleep sharing is awesome, we do it too and we have 2 healthy daughters.
I am not a mama, or married, but I have a lot of friends who are. I know one couple who co-sleeps and it works well for them. I think, given all the negativity you hear about co-sleeping, it’s really a matter of using common sense. If you or your husband is a deep sleeper, co-sleeping might not be the best option.
My folks co-slept with both my brother and I for the first few months until we would sleep alone. My father is a deep sleeper, but it was important to them to have a family bed, so my mom just arranged us between her and the edge of the bed which had pillows stacked so we wouldn’t fall. I can’t report anything negative from my parents or my brother and me.
The shoes are adorable by the way, she’s such a precious and beautiful little girl!
I love her cheeks! and her little shoes! She is the best dressed 2 week old I’ve ever seen. 🙂
You’re doing a great job! She’s so precious and I’m happy the shoes fit. Thanks for the plug. xoxo Love you. Call me again sometime to chat.
She is so beautiful! And you are doing a great job. Take things one day at a time. There will be struggles and tears and frustration and exhaustion, but think of all the joy this little one has already brought! And how many more years ahead you have of this joy. You are a wonderful mom. I also think it is good that you are making your own decisions about what to do with her on certain issues. Everyone will have their own opinion on how to raise a baby 🙂 Do what you feel comfortable with and what works best for you and your family!
Can’t wait for all the new posts next week! And yes her shoes are sooo stinking cute!! I am an aunt-to-be so I might have to order some 🙂
You are loved!
My baby is approaching 5 weeks and we experienced the same thing as parents. My baby sleeps the best while laying on us. She can now sleep at night in a bassinet but she still falls asleep while laying on us. I was also ready throw in the breastfeeding towel around week 3. I will say that part has gotten better.
I’m glad I’m not alone….
such a beautiful baby…love her shoes…so cute
Everyone has their own opinion on everything …breastfeeding, co-sleeping. You just have to do what feels right for you, kev and Rowan.
I remember the first day my husband went back to work and I was home with a newborn and a 2 yr old boy…I was so scared…I promise it will get easier with time
congrats! and good luck with breastfeeding… it does get better and less painful.. when my baby was first born i used to shudder and tense up from the pain with each feeding (didn’t expect that)… it took about a month or so for the pain to go away completely but it got less and less painful with time… she is now three months and we are pros at feeding and there is zero pain… don’t be discouraged if that’s what you want to do 🙂
I am so happy for you two! My little girl just turned one and lately I’ve been wistfully missing those first few weeks when she was itty-bitty. Of course, my memory has faded the fact that breastfeeding was VERY painful, sleep was minimal, hormones/emotions were high and I cried at car commercials… It’s hard for most people in the beginning—I would even guess hard for everyone, though not everyone would admit it. I applaud you for sharing your experience honestly—it will help other women and new mothers understand that we all have to figure this out for ourselves. Books help, but ultimately you know in your heart what’s right for your baby. Congratulations again and welcome to the sisterhood of mothers!
Her shoes are adorable and trust me I know exactly what you’re going through! Alyson’s growth spurt was horrible!! Its starting to get a little bit easier though. Also we co-sleep with Alyson too because its easier for her to fall asleep and she stays asleep for a longer period of time.
I can’t tell you how surprised I was when my son Desmond was born that other mothers didn’t tell me ALL the stuff about the first couple weeks. Actually, I was angry. But now I know that they were just sparing me any added nervousness about being a new mom. It’s not like you have any other choice but to get through it. And then, the wonderfullness of being totally captivated with your perfect new little person comes and you slowly forget the hard stuff. Congratulations on your sweet baby. Enjoy every second and just trust yourself. And stop reading the books. They just made me crazy.
Love Sara
Breastfeeding. Lots of great advice you’ve gotten! If you don’t like breastfeeding, but still want Rowan to have the fabulous nutrition benefits, maybe you could bottle feed a few times a day [give your body a little time to help ease the aching and skin issues that can occur]. Kev would probably love some cuddle bug time with Rowan when he gets home 😀
My little guy wouldn’t breast feed until he was six weeks old. [He would cry/bawl but the second he was at my breast he would clench his jaw shut – this would go on for 45 min each time – and each time I would feel like such a failure]. My husband suggested I just pump for a while so he could connect with Levi over a meal as well and give me some time away from the baby (20 minutes is a start :). I went back to work after six weeks, but Levi started breast feeding that week and it was such relief. It made going back to work that much easier, having that snuggle time with him a few times a day.
Anyway, Levi is 20 weeks old tomorrow and he still has a mind of his own. He will clench his jaw if he we aren’t feeding him the way he wants. Sometimes he wants to snuggle Mommy and others he wants to have a bottle so he can keep his eyes on the action.
I’ll keep you all in my prayers!! You are an amazing Momma and Rowan is so blessed!
Hey Jen!
I don’t share often, but I am just a few months ahead of you and I know exactly what you are going through right now! (Baby Rylee will be 3 months old next week!) I was determined to make it breastfeeding before we started, then we got going and I realized how incredibly PAINFUL it was, she would cry latch on then I would start to cry…not quite the blissful chemistry everyone spoke of 😉 A friend of mine kept reminding me “Give it 2 weeks!” and it was like clockwork, I made it past that 2 week mark and me and baby were much happier – we are in breastfeeding bliss now. So push through! You can do it!!!!
And I am on the same page with you on the sids/bed sharing. I wish I would have had a more open mind about a family bed in the beginning – I was a paranoid beyond belief about sids, and thought I was murdering my baby if I let her sleep with us…. After a few nights of her not wanting to sleep anywhere but in our arms we gave in, and then I started to read up on bed sharing and I am more convinced now that attatchment parenting and a family bed could not be a cause of sids but rather a preventer of it.
It sounds like you guys are doing great! I love reading up on your blog – and keeping up with how the new family is evolving 🙂 It has been so fun to watch your journey and reminice on where we were. Thanks for sharing you journey with us!
-Brit
Rowan is just the cutest little girl! Can’t wait for all of your upcoming posts :]
Oh wow, pretty Rowan.. I’m glad that you’re sharing your stories as new mom.. Although I won’t be a mom anytime soon, I just love reading them.. And I can say that I’m really happy that I found your blog 🙂
The November Girl
Time is going to fly by so quickly and one day you’ll realise that breastfeeding isn’t painful … it will be painful for awhile but it’s so nice that you are still keeping up with it. It’s giving your daughter a fantastic start to life.
The first three months with a newborn are the hardest… the arrival of your first child throws your WHOLE LIFE upside down and inside out. You have to rework your relationship with your hubby…. it does always get easier but communication is the key…. and knowing you are going through the same thing as every body else..
It’s great you are so honest about it. 🙂
Biggest thing I learned with my first son….you have to do what works for you. Our son stayed in our bed for a about a month now he is in his crib about 11 hrs each night….ge is 11 mon now. Even still it is rare but there are nights he is with us. You have to do what works for you and your husband.
Beastfeeding…it is hard to believe but if you are able to hang in there it gets better and soon it will not hurt anymore.
Hang in there you guys are doing great!!!!
Rowan is precious! I love her name!
Have a great day!
I know I posted yesterday but I was looking at Rowans pictures today and she just takes my breath away. She’s so perfect.
I was thinking about some of the things you wrote and I appreciate your honesty with the breastfeeding thing. I think it’s important for women to know that they’re not alone in how hard it can be or even disliking it. I feel like now a days if you say you dont want to nurse that you’re looked at like a bad mom and it’s not fair.
But I wanted to tell you about these things my sister in law talks about. To her they were the savior to her being able to nurse. They’re called “shields”. I think they’re more for helping a baby who has a hard time latching which I can see you are doing well with. But they also help it to not hurt mommy so much and keep you from getting chapped nips! Of course if you’re doing well getting used to it you’ll probably just stick with it. But I figured I’d share.
http://www.amazon.com/Nipple-Shields-For-Nursing-Mothers/dp/B0037YDN0A
She is too darn cute for words. Ahhh, I wish my little girl was a baby girl again!
As far as bed sharing, I think it is such a case by case basis. For me and my daughter, it was a natural choice because it was just her and me. It was a comfort to both of us. I am such a huge believer in the idea that parents (and babies/children) do what works for them. They adapt to work with their own situations. It is so hard to put a blanket statement such as “breastfeeding is always best” or “co-sleeping is terrible” on parenting. That being said, I know it can be hard when you’ve spend nine months reading about what to/not to do. You’ll figure it all out! 😉 It seems like you’re well on your way. Take care of you, Kev, and baby!
I never thought I would, but I really love bed sharing and can’t imagine life without it now (my girl is 13 months).
Just snapped up a pacifier clip from Laura’s esty shop! too cute.
she is SO PRECIOUS!! So very exciting!
Congrats Jen for having such a lovely baby! I remember my sister talking about how awful breastfeading was at the beginning but after a few weeks it all went pretty good!
Your baby is so beautiful. My son is three years old and I have been with him every day of his life. I recently wrote two articles from the male perspective on associatedcontent.com, Oh my god she wants to have a baby, and We are gonna make a baby and would love your point of view, thanks.
she’s a beautiful little doll!
breastfeeding is hard for many moms–i think many of us have an image of some peaceful, emotional experience that comes naturally, and it’s not always that way! like other moms said, sometimes things will “click” after a few weeks…but even if you don’t nurse for very long, you have already given her a wonderful start!
whatever you choose to do, someone will always disagree, but you’re the mama now, and you will find what’s best for you and your wee one…
BREASTFEEDING WILL GET EASIER, I PROMISE. GIVE IT AT LEAST A MONTH, MAYBE TWO
Hi Jen! I like your blog. I just wanted to say please stick with breastfeeding for a while longer and see how it improves. I think your plan to wait a month and then decide is a good one. If you can stick with it for two, all the better.
Breastfeeding my newborn son was a nightmare. It hurt like HELL. And let’s just say there was some cracking and bleeding involved. It hurt. A lot.
But after a month, it improved drastically. By month two, it was so easy. I ended up nursing my son for a little over 2 years.
He never had colds as a baby. Never. I think the immunity from breastmilk did a great thing! It was also cheap…much cheaper than formula. And so convenient, once the pain subsided.
If you aren’t allergic or sensitive, I recommend Lansinoh! products. They might help. There is also a product called Soothies…they are pads that you apply to the nipple/breast and they work like magic. They are pricey, but so worth it. They relieve the pain like nothing else and helped with healing. I got mine from a breastfeeding supply store, but you can probably find them online. Soothies. They are awesome. Worth every penny.
Good luck!!
Oh, I see someone else commented on nipple shields. Good advice! I used nipple shields for about a month I think. They really did help while my baby was figuring out the latch and why the nipples were toughening up a bit.
I recommend getting the latex shields and trying them out. Did the hospital you birthed at have a lactation consultant by chance? He/She would be able to tell you more about shields. I also recommend – again – the Soothies products. They are amazing. Best of luck!!
She’s adorable! And what a fashionable little girl- perfect for the fashion blog!
I’m a little surprised that while so many are concerned with encouraging you soldier on with the breast feeding – no one even blinked at the co-sleeping….
My husband works in Child Protection Services- and it breaks his heart each time he has to process the morgue photos for children crushed in their sleep by well meaning parents….
That said – I know kids that HATE being restrained in their car seats – just SCREAM going down the highway…so do you -in an effort to give yourself the necessary decibel level to focus on driving – let them forgo the old car seat/seat belt?
Sleep training takes time….and it SUCKS for the parents in the interim – but the possible risk of crushing your child seems far FAR worse.
Rowan is gorgeous and I absolutely love her name! Congratulations!
Good job for pressing through with all the hard stuff. It does just keep getting easier and easier.
The same is true for the breastfeeding. After I had my first baby and home visit nurse told me that most people give up on breastfeeding before their baby is six weeks not knowing that it is all up hill from there. I’d say that was true for me. After six weeks I had pretty much gotten the hang of it and it became truly easy and enjoyable. It’d definitely not true that it’s like that from right off the bat. So, good for you for trying your best. I know it’s not easy, let alone adding sleep deprivation and the adjustment into being a mommy.
I know everyone says breast feeding is best, but formula has come a very long way! I had no option but to formula feed Mikey since he was adopted, and he had no problems whatsoever (colds, sickness; in the first year). And i hate to hear the whole “bonding” thing is different. You are still there cuddling with baby so it really makes no difference. And with Evan, I made it to month 3 breast feeding and just couldn’t do it anymore. It hurt, was always sore. Sure, I wish I saw a lactation consultant before I gave up, but whatever you feel like is right for you, go for it. Don’t let your fears of what anyone will say about you make your decision.
For Mike, after month 2 of not sleeping; but only sleeping on our chest; we found out that the formula he was one wasn’t good for him; allergies; belly hurt. So, when they are gassy babies, the pressure on their little bellies helps.
Co-sleeping, co-sleeping, co-sleeping! Don’t let America’s paranoia ruin this amazing bonding opportunity. It was advocated by both my pediatrician and mid-wife. Skin to skin is best, just like after they are born. It will give baby and you and Kev time for sweet dream. It is practiced around the world and is an incredible bond builder. I am so happy that I was given that advice and miss those days. Also to repeat everyone breast feeding truly does get easier as you grow into your new and very challenging role. Just remember to be patient with and kind to yourself. You’re body is working miracles, be damn proud of yourself Jen. Rowan is such a lucky soul to have you and Kev to guide her through this world. Also don’t feel bad if you aren’t enjoying every moment, it’s tough be honest with yourself….you’ve done a really great job at that from the posts you’ve put up. You’re phenomenal – remember that.
I’ve never commented before, but I love your blog and visit all the time 🙂
I have a 10-day old baby girl and a 2-year old daughter,and we’ve co-slept with both of them. While every baby and parent and situation is different, it was the perfect choice for our family…both girls are great sleepers, and my husband and I sleep a thousand times better knowing we can see and feel every movement or noise our little one makes. I know there are lots of nay-sayers on co-sleeping, but done safely it can be such a peaceful, safe way for babies to sleep. Even in my deepest sleep, i was always completely aware of my baby sleeping on my chest, and always woke up when she stirred. We did it with our first until she was about 4 months, then transitioned to a crib in our room, then at 8 months she moved into her own room, and each move was smooth with no problems; which I think is because she never felt alone in those first few important months.
Best of luck! Do what you think is the best for your family…you are the only ones who know what works for sweet Rowan!
Rowan is such a cutie !
Have a great week Jen!
Hello, here from Dear Baby and congrats on your lovely Rowan!! I am 32 weeks pregnant with our girl Ever, but it’s our fourth babe. 🙂 Those first weeks are such a whirlwind and I loved reading your experience.
Have you heard of this method of calming a baby? http://www.wisebread.com/how-to-stop-a-baby-from-crying?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+wisebread+(Wise+Bread)
the videos are amazing. i dont have kids yet but if u try it tell me if it works!
also, one of my friends had a baby recently and i made her lactation cookies. they are super yummy…and they are supposed to help you produce more milk! give it a whirl if your supply is low 🙂
No one can prepare you for how hard it is! We are 3 months in and all I can say is it is so so much better now. I wouldn’t take back those first weeks, but to say it was rough would be an understatement! It’s so easy to second guess and read all the scary things out there, but my belief is you do what you need to do. If that means baby sleeps on your chest… so be it 🙂 After all, they’re teeny tiny babies that need ya. Just love on ’em and enjoy the sweet moments. Good luck & I love discovering your blog!
thank you for reminding me how tough the first few weeks are with a newborn! after almost 3 years you kinda forget and i’m about to be starting it all over again! and about breastfeeding- one of my nurses told me it would hurt like heck for 2-3 weeks but after that your body would adjust and heal and you wouldn’t feel any pain– i think it was exactly 2 weeks when that point hit for me- so stick with it as long as you can put up with the pain and use LOTS of lanolin cream! it will get better!!! (and i’m a tad bit jealous that my mom has already met Miss Rowan!)
aaww, her little booties are so cute!!
Jen, so glad you are following your instincts and not listening to the “experts.” We are a bed-sharing, co-sleeping family. We didn’t start out intending to be, but my daughter would only sleep on us too. We’re still sharing a bed with our 18 month old and starting to discuss transitioning her into her own bed. My heart breaks a little and we may put it off a little longer because she has her whole life to sleep in her own bed, right?
I remember the first six weeks being maybe the scariest weeks of my life because I was responsible for this brand new life and I didn’t know what I was doing and my mom was halfway across the country. It’s tough, all of it. BUT it gets better. Everything gets better and your hormones start to stabilize around six weeks. I was an anxious, worried mess until my hormones stopped going crazy. You will survive, your daughter will survive. Trust yourself. You know your baby better than anyone, so don’t let other tell you what’s best. You will learn more about her each day and that will make it easier.
Don’t be afraid to get help if you feel to overwhelmed. It never hurts to talk to a counselor. I know I mentioned it before, but I can’t recommend kellymom.com and the forums for breastfeeding support. Also, a local Le Leche League can be very helpful. It’s great to even talk about your frustrations with other moms who are in the same boat. Your baby won’t always nurse as frequently as she is in the begininning. Her tummy is still really tiny, but as she grows she won’t need to nurse as often and you won’t be as overwhelmed. Great job for setting a goal! Hang in there.
Fia
Sorry, just wanted to leave a few links to put to rest the worries you might have after reading S&S’s comment. Co-sleeping is not dangerous and definitely not MORE dangerous than crib sleeping if don’t safely.
88 death per 100,000
Co-sleeping safety
I hope this gives you peace about your decision, Jen. 🙂
*don’t=done. whoops.
You’re smart to follow your instincts and take everything you read with a grain of salt. I could have written this same post when my son was this age. Now that I’ve been through it, I think the best advice I could offer a new mom is to do what works best for your family.
It took me awhile to start to love breastfeeding too. I remember reading how breastfeeding was supposed to be such a peaceful period of bonding for mom and baby, but it was not like that for me at first. We’ve been through a lot in the breastfeeding department and I am so happy that I stuck with it. I really do love it now.
It sounds like you and your husband are doing an incredible job. She’s absolutely beautiful.
I can relate to your new mom worries. My girls are bigger now, but those first weeks with my oldest were harrowing, to say the least. You go from being a functioning, independent adult, to being completely at the mercy of this little person…it’s super-hard.
Breastfeeding is also very hard. I had all kinds of issues with my first, but it miraculously does get better. Soon we were both champs at it.
My best advice? Don’t listen to others’ advice. 🙂 No really, listen to the little voice in your head. It’s right. If it feels right to co-sleep? Do it. When I finally started to listen to what I instinctively felt would work with my first baby, things went much smoother, and I was generally happier.
Best wishes to you and your little family.
you figured it out early…go with the flow…and do what feels right for you guys! i had a horrible time breastfeeding as well and did stick it out for a month..after meeting with 3 different pediatricians and 5 lactation consultants – but it was not an enjoyable experience for anyone in our household..including our son. he’s now 19 months and couldn’t be healthier… do what you need to do and enjoy that sweet little girl!
We did co-sleeping until our oldest was almost 4 and the baby was 2. We had mattresses all over the bedroom floor. We had barely any space to walk, but everyone slept well. Now, that both of my boys are in their own room, I’m happy that we had time.
Also, my second refused to sleep without being held so I used a woven wrap (bb slen was the one I had) and he slept while I wore him and I was able to do small chores like laundry. etc.
Hang in there mama!! You’re doing great!
I meant to say I was happy that we had that time together.
Oops! 🙂
Jen,
First of all, I MISS YOU like crazy!! I Never enjoyed nursing with the first two, it was only on the third time around I’m enjoying it much more. And the whole sleeping thing? Do what works for you until they get a little older:)
Congrats! I love your blog. I’m a week behind you (my little one is 2 weeks old) and we’re dealing with all the same issues as you so you’re not alone. I think I asked every friend with a baby and made myself sick reading about what to do and what not to do but honestly just go with your gut. This is your baby and you are the only one who knows the right way to raise her. Everyone will have an option but you will always do the right thing. Good luck!
I wouldnt even think of running with out my bodyglide. It makes long runs possible!!